On Monday morning (March 9), I copied these words from Oswald Chambers’s My Utmost for His Highest into my journal:

“Showing no concern for the uncertainties that lie ahead is the secret of walking with Jesus.”

I wish I could say that I naturally focus on Jesus and ignore my uncertainties.  The truth, however, is that uncertainty can cripple me, and just a few weeks ago, I was uncertain about a lot.  I didn’t know (and still don’t fully know) where I will live in Spain, what grade I will teach, how my current friendships may change, and which church I will attend when I move in August.  In the days before I left for my vision trip (which lasted from March 4 to March 11), the uncertainty almost stopped me in my tracks.

Yet, after traversing cobblestone streets of Toledo for a few hours and indulging in the best piece of tortilla Española on Monday afternoon, I added this statement to my journal: “I’m moving to Spain.  I know that it will be hard, but I cannot pass up such a great opportunity to serve God and enjoy His world.”  I can’t fully explain why, but in Toledo God gave me peace about my uncertainties.  He is in control of every obstacle that I will face as I move to Europe.

After spending a week in Spain and meeting missionaries who currently serve there, I feel excited to return (in fact, I didn’t really want to leave).  My mouth is watering for more tortilla, and my camera is ready to capture more buildings that were built before Columbus sailed to the New World.  But even more, I am excited to serve alongside the missionaries who showed me that God constantly orchestrates His own plan, and I want to share this truth with my future students.

Just before leaving for the airport on Wednesday morning (March 11), I added another statement from Oswald Chambers to my journal.

“If you select your own spot to be planted [rather than letting God plant you wherever He chooses], you will prove yourself to be an unproductive, empty pod.”

Lord, give me this one target:  allowing You to plant me wherever You choose, despite my uncertainties, so that I can be productive for You.